Life Among the Cullens
by Permanent Rose
Summary: /"Edward?" I asked as Emmett tore through the house shrieking like a girl. "Is there a such thing as a vampire sugar rush?"/ Life among the Cullens can be a bit...strange as Bella finds out as she gets to know her family to be.
1. Bowling with the Cullens

A/N: I wrote this when was I was in a random mood. All these one shots (for the time being) will be from Bella's POV.

Bowling with the Cullens

Saturday. It had been Edward's idea to go bowling. So Edward, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie, and I had all piled into Emmett's Jeep Wrangler. Carlisle had to work, and Esme had given up bowling after an incident that had happened a few years earlier, which Edward wouldn't get into.

The Cullens all owned their own bowling shoes, but I, on the other hand, did not. I cringed as I put on the grimy pair of rental shoes.

Edward gave me a sympathetic look, "I'll buy you a pair for your birthday, ok?"

I shot him a look. He knew how much I dreaded my birthday.

"Why don't you choose a ball?" said Edward, changing the subject. He motioned toward a rack of balls.

I went over to the rack and began to go through the balls. I picked up a hot pink one. Big mistake. The greasy ball slid through my fingers and fell on my foot.

"Ow!" I exclaimed, awkwardly hopping on my unhurt foot.

Edward caught me and sat me down on one of the benches. He was laughing.

"I should have known taking you bowling was a mistake. Only you could manage to hurt yourself before we even begin bowling." He continued to chuckle.

"It's not funny," I tried to glare at him. I took off my shoe and began to massage my swollen foot.

"Would you like me to kiss it for you? Would that make it better?" his topaz eyes were full of laughter and amusement.

I nodded and thrust my foot toward his face.

He smiled and said, "How about I do this instead?"

He pressed his lips to my eyelid then brushed his lips over mine. My heart began to beat ten times faster than usual.

"Will that do?" he smiled his lovely crooked smile that I adored.

I nodded, still breathing hard.

"All better," I said, pulling my bowling shoe back over my foot.

He handed me a six pound ball. "I'm sorry, Bella, but they don't make them any lighter than this."

I punched him playfully on the arm and took the ball.

"Edward!" called Alice, "You're up first!"

He picked up a sixteen pound ball and made his way up to the lane. He swiftly threw the ball so that it was only a blur of color. With a tremendous crash, all the pins were easily knocked down.

"Wow," I mouthed as he came to join me back on the bench.

"That was nothing," he bragged, "You should see us when we really bowl. Of course, we only get one turn then because we shatter all pins and make a hole through the back of the lane."

"I'd like to see that sometime," I said, remembering the baseball game they had taken me to.

"Bella," announced Alice, "It's you're turn!"

She was playing on one lane with Edward and I, while Emmett, Rosalie, and Jasper took another one.

"Bella," said Edward, handing me my ball, "Please try not to hurt yourself."

"I'll try my best," I said, taking a deep breath and stepping up toward the lane.

I tried to imitate Edward's graceful way of throwing the ball. Of course, I was incapable, and didn't even come close. The ball landed with a thud and quickly rolled into the gutter.

My vampire friends were suppressing giggles as I sat down to join them.

"Hey," I said, "I'm only human. What did you expect?"

I was enthralled as I watched the others take their turns. None of them failed to make a strike.

My next two turns ended in gutter balls.

"I guess I'm pretty hopeless, huh?" I sat down beside Edward.

He nodded, "Bowling is just not one of your strengths."

I laughed. I was having trouble just coming up with one of my strengths.

In the fifth frame, I finally managed to knock down three pins.

"Look! Edward, look!" I exclaimed, pointing toward the fallen pins, "Three pins!" I squealed.

"Excellent, Bella," he said, taking me in his arms, "Here's your reward."

He kissed me full on the lips. His overpowering scent filled my lungs. He pressed his lips to my throat then found my lips again.

"What are you going to do if I make a strike?" I breathed.

"We'll find out when you make one," he said, running his fingers through my hair.

"If," I corrected, "Not when."

"Oh, you will," Alice chimed in, reminding me of her abilities to see the future.

My next time up, I picked a ten pound ball instead of my usual six.

"I'd watch out, Bella," warned Edward, "That ball is a whole four pounds heavier than what you've been using."

"I know," I said as I lugged the ball toward the lane.

I took the ball in both hands and threw it onto the lane with all my might. It landed with a loud thump as I slid on the soles of my slippery shoes and landed in a heap on the ground.

"Bella! Look!" shrieked Alice.

I untangled myself from my own limbs and looked up to see what Alice meant.

The ball was rolling down the dead center of the lane. It hit the pins with crash causing them all to fall down.

"EDWARD!" I screamed, running, sliding on the slippery floor, "Did you see?! Did you see?!"

He caught me in his arms, "Yes, Bella," he took my face in his hands, and kissed me again, "I did see, but I'm having trouble believing my eyes."

I sat down heavily in Edward's lap, feeling quite worn out.

Alice stood up to take her turn. She chose the pretty pink ball that I had dropped on my foot previously. With a flourish, she twirled before throwing the ball. She threw it so swiftly that I didn't even hear it hit the lane. Of course, she got a strike. She danced back over to where we were sitting.

"Show off," I murmured as Edward got up to take his turn.

Emmett and Jasper sat idly as Rosalie took her turn.

"Are you guys bored yet?" I asked.

Emmett turned to face me.

"No," he said, "Not at all. Jasper and I are challenging each other to see who can throw the ball the slowest and still get a strike."

I rolled my eyes. Vampires.

By the end of the game, everyone had scored three hundred, with the exception of me, who had just made it over thirty.

"Who's up for another game?" asked Emmett.

I groaned. Everyone else was in.

"Oh, Bella," said Edward, "Don't be such a spoil sport. I'll go get you bumpers!"

And before I could protest, he was up at the front counter.

"There, Bella," he said, "Maybe now you can get past forty. No more gutter balls. At least, I hope not. I wouldn't put it past you, though."

"Very funny," I said, and took my ball up to the lane.

I swung my arm as hard as I could. The ball went flying out of my grasp and zigzagged from bumper to bumper. The ball stopped dead in it's tracks about a foot away from the pins.

"Oh darn," I said, "That's almost worse than getting a gutter ball."

Edward had to go up to the front desk again and get one of the employees to retrieve my ball.

"This is more trouble than its worth," said Edward, closing his eyes "If I could take a nap, this is when I would do it."

"I swear I'll knock some down this time," I said when my turn came again.

"You go do that, Bella," said Edward.

Determined, I threw the ball as hard as I could. It landed in the gutter.

"I told you I wouldn't put it past you," said Edward as I took my seat.

We decided it was time to go home after Emmett threw the ball so hard that it got stuck in the wall behind the lane.

"Well," said Edward as we headed for the car, "That was certainly an interesting experience."

I nodded in agreement as I collapsed in one of the seats. I snuggled up against Edward's cold chest. I was ready to fall asleep.

"That was tiring," I said, and yawned, as if to prove it.

"Let's not go bowling again for a while," I suggested.

Edward nodded, brushing my hair away from my face.

"Yes," he murmured, "A long while."


	2. Easter with the Cullens

A/N: I must've been high on Easter candy when I wrote this :)

Easter with the Cullens

"Tomorrow's spring break! Tomorrow's spring break! Tomorrow's spring break!" Emmett tore through the house at vampire speed, screaming at the top of his lungs.

Edward and I were downstairs doing homework. (Well, if you could count being wrapped in your boyfriend's arms with his lips against your hair homework…) We both looked up in confusion as Emmett passed by.

"SPRINGBREAKSPRINGBREAKSPRINGBREAK!" Emmett shrieked.

"Wow," I said to Edward, "Is there such a thing as a vampire sugar rush?"

"Not that I know of," Edward mumbled.

Edward gently unwrapped me from his arms and placed me on the couch. He got up and took Emmett squarely by the shoulders.

"Would you mind tell us what the heck is going on?" Edward asked his insane brother.

"SPRING BREAK!" Emmett yelled. I winced slightly at the pain from the high-pitched noise. I hated to think what poor Edward's ears felt like.

"And what is ever so special about spring break?" Edwards said through gritted teeth.

"EASTER!" Emmett squealed like a small child.

"Yes?" Edward prodded.

"EASTER MEANS CANDY!" Emmett was insanely ecstatic.

"But Emmett," I reminded him, "You can't eat candy."

"I don't care!" he replied, "I LOVE CHOCOLATE BUNNIES!"

"That would explain his sugar rush," reasoned Edward, "Emmett, go to the bathroom and puke it up."

"But, Edward…" Emmett attempted puppy dog eyes.

"Now!" said Edward and Emmett dragged his feet off toward the direction of the scarcely used bathroom.

Edward sighed deeply and joined me again on the couch.

"Now where were we?" he murmured as he pulled me close to his chest and brought his lips close to mine.

"Guess what?"

We both looked up to see Alice twirl through the room.

"Easter's soon and—" Alice began.

"No! Not you too!" Edward groaned.

"What?" asked Alice.

"We've already had to deal with Emmett on a sugar rush—"

"Sugar rush?" repeated Alice.

"Apparently, Emmett got into a bag of chocolate bunnies…" said Edward.

"Oh!" exclaimed Alice, "I gave them to him. Sorry about that!"

"Alice!" Edward and I said simultaneously.

"Well, anyway," Alice tried to avoid our glares, "As I was saying, Easter's soon and there's going to be an Easter egg hunt for the children at the park. I thought it sounded nice so I signed us all up to help out!"

"Alice!" Edward and I said in unison again.

"I thought it would be fun!" Alice tried, "And they'll be free candy for those who volunteer…"

"I'm in!" Emmett had appeared back from the bathroom.

"No!" Edward began to hit his head against the wall.

"I'm afraid he has no choice, Edward," said Alice, "As I said previously, I've already signed us all up. And you wouldn't want to disappoint all those children, now would you, Edward?"

"Fine," Edward grumbled, "Emmett can do it. And so will we." He nodded in my direction.

"We?" I repeated, "When did I ever say _I'd _do it?"

"You're doing it, Bella," demanded Edward, "I need the support."

"Oh, fine," I reluctantly agreed, "As long as you don't make me do anything stupid."

"Goody!" Alice shouted, "I'll tell you the job options. Rose! Jasper! Get down here. Now!"

Jasper was down in a flash, immediately at his wife's side. Rosalie took her good old time to get down, though.

"What do you want now, Alice?" Rosalie asked in a bored tone.

"I'm going to assign us all jobs for the Easter egg hunt!" Alice replied happily.

"Oh, no you don't!" Rosalie turned to leave, but Emmett grasped her tightly.

"Let me go!" she shrieked, trying to pull away from Emmett's iron grasp.

"No!" said Emmett, holding her tighter, "I'll sit on you if you don't behave."

Rosalie scowled, but obeyed, arranging herself contently in Emmett's lap.

"Alright!" said Alice, "Let's get started! First, we need people to put the candy in the eggs. Then we'll need someone to hide them. We'll also need a few people to oversee the hunt to make sure none of the little kids kill each other. And, oh, there's always the Easter Bunny!"

"I WANT TO BE THE EASTER BUNNY!!" Emmett screamed.

Edward and I exchanged looks. Jasper and Alice broke out laughing. Rosalie just stared at him, as if trying to figure out what possessed her husband.

"You can't be the Easter Bunny," said Alice still laughing, "You'll scare all the little kids, not to mention crush them if you give them a hug."

Emmett looked dejected, which made Jasper laugh even more.

"The Easter Bunny _cannot _be a vampire," Alice continued.

Edward got a mischievous look in his eyes, "Bella can do it!"

"NO!" I wheeled around to face my betrayer, "I WILL NOT BE THE EASTER BUNNY!"

Everyone stared at me for a moment before speaking.

"Well," said Alice slowly, "Bella is obviously not going to be the Easter Bunny. I guess Emmett's the only one left, unless you'd like to do it, Rosalie…"

"Never!" Rosalie gave her the death glare.

"Well, that's one job down," said Alice as Emmett gave a whoop, "Rose, Jazzy, and I can fill and hide the eggs. Bella and Edward can supervise the hunt."

"Fine," everyone but Emmett grumbled, knowing that with Alice in charge, we had no choice.

"Great!" exclaimed Alice, "The hunt's on Saturday. And no one, and I repeat _no one_, is allowed to drop out."

We all glared at her.

"That's it!" said Alice sweetly, "You can go back to what you were doing before!"

Alice decided she needed to go shopping and begged Jasper to go with her. Emmett dragged a still grumbling Rosalie up to their bedroom, and Edward and I remained on the couch.

"Now that that's over with," he said, flashing a grin, "We can get back to us."

Edward wrapped his arms around me once more. He pulled my face up to his, picking up where we had left off. The space between our lips closed, causing me to forget absolutely everything.

* * *

"I AM THE EASTER BUNNY!! MUHAHAHAHA!!" Emmett hopped through the doorway in his fluffy bunny costume.

Edward rolled his eyes, "Spare me…"

"I think he looks kind of cute…" I giggled as Emmett hopped over to me with his basket full of chocolate bunnies.

"Do you want a bunny, Bella?" Emmett thrust his basket toward me, "I would have one, but _someone—_cough , cough, Edward—won't let me."

"Thanks, Emmett," I said as I took one of the treats and popped it into my mouth, "Oh, these are good! Could I have another one?"

"Sure, Bella!" Emmett said, then glared at Edward, "Told you so!"

"Is everyone ready to leave?" Alice had appeared. She was wearing a lime green skirt and a striped top the made her look like a giant Easter egg.

"Bella!" Alice exclaimed when she saw me, "What in the world do you think you're wearing?!"

"What's wrong with my clothes?" I asked as I looked down at my brown top, my brown pants, and my brown shoes.

"It's Easter!" Alice took my hands and began to drag me up the steps, "You have to wear something colorful. Your outfit will make the children cry!"

"But I like my outfit…" I mumbled, but seemed to remain unheard.

Before I knew what was happening, Alice had forced a bright yellow top with a fuzzy yellow chick on over my head. I tried to protest, but Alice picked me up and ran me downstairs.

"Time to go!" Alice yelled when we got down.

"Cute," Edward said as I returned to his side. I glared.

Jasper appeared a moment later in a pink shirt and a headband with bunny ears on his head, looking quite miserable. Alice's doings, no doubt.

"ROSALIE!!" Alice screamed much louder than necessary, "GET YOUR BUTT DOWN HERE!! NOW!!"

Rosalie trudged down the step, a look of pure hatred on her face. And when she turned her face up, I saw why. Alice (or at least I assumed it was Alice) had painted a little Easter bunny on each of her cheeks. She walked past Alice without looking at her, her nose held high in the air to join her Easter Bunny husband.

"Rosalie!" Alice shrieked, "What did you do with your shirt? It matched the bunnies on your face!"

"Alice, did you really expect me to wear that retarded shirt?" Rosalie snapped, "I have myself esteem to consider here! I thought _this _shirt was much more appropriate for the occasion."

Rosalie was wearing a light pink tank top with a plunging neck line.

"Rosalie, you are a married woman!" Alice protested.

"And I love it," said her husband.

Rosalie flashed him grin. Alice rolled her eyes. Seeing that she had lost this one, she said, "Let's go! We're going to be late!"

* * *

Once at the park, Alice, Jasper, and Rosalie went off to hide the eggs. Edward, Emmett, and I waited by the gazebo in the park until the children arrived. Much to Alice's delight, dark, malevolent clouds filled the afternoon sky.

"Why can't Forks be like other towns and have nice, sunny spring weather?" I sighed as I began to pace.

"Tell me about it," replied Edward, joining me in my pacing.

"Come on, guys," said Emmett, "It isn't that bad. At least you aren't the one in a bunny suit."

"Give me a break," Edward rolled his eyes, "You're the one who _wanted _to be the bunny."

"Yeah, Bunnicula," I said crossly.

"Bunnicula?" Emmett repeated dumbly.

"Bunnicula," I said, "You know, the vampire rabbit?"

Edward smiled, but Emmett continued to stare at me blankly.

"Can I have another bunny, Emmett?" I asked after a moment.

"Sure," said Emmett and handed me another bunny.

I munched contently on the rabbit, beginning to feel a slight buzz in my head.

"Look! It's the Easter Bunny!" a small child shrieked. He began to run toward Emmett on his fat, short legs, throwing himself upon Emmett full force. Unfortunately, this doesn't quite work if the Easter Bunny is as hard as granite.

The little boy did what all small children do. He cried. No, make that wailed. Emmett stared in shock at the child. After a moment, he composed himself and picked up the boy.

"HAPPY EASTER!" Emmett tried to cheer the boy up, "Do you want a chocolate bunny from Mr. Easter Bunny?"

The child began to cry harder. Emmett shoved a bunny in his mouth anyway.

"Emmett," Edward hissed, "Put the kid down!"

Emmett gave Edward a look before placing the child on the ground. A moment later, a young woman appeared.

"Matthew!" she shrieked, "Is everything all right? Don't worry, Mommy's here!"

The child was too distraught to speak, so the woman led him away, making sure to glare at Emmett before turning to go.

"Remember, the Easter Bunny loves you!" Emmett called after them, then to us, "What? Alright, that didn't go exactly perfectly, but it wasn't _that _bad."

We both glared at Emmett. He grinned sheepishly.

"Bella!" I turned to hear a familiar voice.

"Mike? What are you doing here?"

I heard Edward emit a low grow.

Mike grinned, "My little cousins are over for Easter and my aunt asked me if I would bring them to the hunt." Somehow it seemed that Mike was now quite glad that he had come.

Suddenly two mini-Mikes came running over, "Mikey! Mikey!" they shrieked, "We want so see the Bunny!"

"That one's Ryan, and the other one's Kyle," Mike informed us as the twins proceeded to give Emmett a hug.

"I didn't think you'd be here," Mike continued.

"Well, yeah," I said, trying to think of something to say that would make him go away, "I thought I'd be nice to help. Oh, that reminds me, I have to finish hiding the eggs!"

I grabbed Edward's arm and dragged him off toward the sight of the hunt.

"I'm going to kill Newton!" Edward hissed.

Thankfully, Alice appeared before Edward's thoughts could get more murderous.

"How's it going, guys?" Alice asked.

"Excellent," Edward said at the same time I said, "Great," We both plastered fake smiles across our face.

"Good!" said Alice, who was having too much fun to see through our lie.

"Oh, Bella," she added, "There were some left over jellybeans from the hunt. I thought you might like some."

"Sure!" I said, taking the bag. I shoved a handful in my mouth.

Edward and I went back to join Emmett. Along the way, I continued to eat the jellybeans.

"These are really good jellybeans, Edward!" my voice was a bit too high. I felt my feet stagger.

"Bella?" Edward stopped and straightened me out, "Are you alright?"

"I'm great!" I screamed through a mouthful of jellybeans.

"Bella, give me the candy," Edward grabbed the bag from my hands.

"NOOOOO!!" I wailed, trying to retrieve the bag, "I WANT JELLYBEANS!"

"Oh, Lord," I heard Edward mumble, "Not another Emmett Episode."

"EDWARDGIVEMEMYJELLYBEANSNOWORIWILLHURTYOU!!" I said the words so fast that I couldn't even understand them myself.

"Bella. Calm down. Now." Edward's voice was surprisingly composed.

"NEEDMOREJELLYBEANSSUGARNOW!! I fell into Edward's arms. I don't remember anything else.

* * *

I woke up with a massive headache on Edward's couch two hours later.

"Edward?" I whispered. My throat was terribly sore.

"Yes, darling?" he cradled me in his arms.

"I hate Easter."

"So do I," Edward agreed, "So do I."


	3. The Cullens and the Talent Show

The Cullens and the Talent Show

"Hey, look at this."

Edward had stopped in front of the bulletin board just outside of the cafeteria. He was looking at colorful flyer announcing tryouts for the talent show.

"What?" I asked, looking confused, "Do you really think I have enough talent to be in a talent show?"

"Well," Edward responded, "I was actually thinking about myself…but you should definitely tryout."

"Edward," I tried to reason with him, "People who tryout for the talent show usually have some skill in the areas of singing, dancing, or playing an instrument. Sorry to break it to you, but my talent is lacking in those areas."

"True, true," he said, and then got a mischievous grin on his face, "But I bet you are the only human who can walk across a flat surface and trip more than five times."

I glared at him and punched him playfully on the arm, forgetting that his skin was as hard as granite.

"Ouch," I mumbled, rubbing my swollen fist.

Edward took my hand and pressed it lightly to his lips. Any sign of pain was immediately gone.

"We better be going," said Edward, looking at the clock, "Or we'll be late for biology."

As we made our way down the hall, I remembered that he had mentioned that he was interested in trying out.

"Edward, you said before that you wanted to try out for the talent show. What would you do?"

I let my mind wander to the possibilities. Maybe he would lift a car or run across the stage at inhuman speed. No. Those were all too conspicuous.

"I will play the piano," he said, using a tone that let me know that I should've known that. It was pretty obvious, come to think of it.

I then thought of all the perfectly good pianists who would be put to shame if Edward tried out.

"Have you been in the talent show before?" I asked out of curiosity.

"Not in Forks," he admitted, "But there's a first time for everything. Now we really are going to be late if we don't hurry," he added.

"But—" there were so many things I still wanted to ask him.

"Later," he said, taking my hand and dragging me down the hall toward biology, "I promise."

* * *

It turned out that all the Cullens tried out for the talent show. (It took a lot of convincing on Edward's part to persuade a few of them.) Of course, all of them made it. I found myself feeling bad for all the mortals who considered themselves talented. Edward explained to me what each of them was doing.

Edward was going to play the piano, just as he said he would. He was playing a light and happy tune that he had written himself, a piece that put Bach and Beethoven to shame.

Alice was dancing, ballet to be exact. When I asked why ballet, she said she liked ballet better because of all the twirls. That's Alice for you.

I was surprised to hear that Jasper was singing. He didn't strike me as a singer, but he had a surprisingly charismatic voice, which shouldn't have shocked me, considering his ability.

Emmett and Rosalie were doing a karate act together. Emmett I could understand, but Rosalie? When I asked Edward, he said, "Rosalie would never admit it, but she can't sing or dance to save her life. You should hear her in the shower!"

This made me laugh, and I added that to my mental list (which happened to be very short and rarely added to) of things that Rosalie was not perfect at. Not that I was any better at these things than her.

I was beginning to look forward to the talent show, (usually I dreaded it, just thinking about the endless acts of people all singing songs that all sound the same) when Edward announced that he had signed me up for stage crew.

"Please, Bella," he said, leaning close to face, leaving me dazed and short of breath, "It will be fun. Besides, what will you do on the days I have after school practice? You'll be all _alone._"

The fact that he was just inches from my face, and the mere thought of surviving the afternoons without him left me no choice.

"Oh fine!" I huffed in hopeless defeat.

He smiled, a look of triumph on his face.

* * *

"Omigodimgoingtomessupandruinthewholeshow!" I hyperventilated. The day of the talent show had come much too fast.

"Calm down, Bella," Edward's voice was composed and soothing, "No one's even going to see you, remember?"

I tried to nod, but my eyes with locked with his topaz ones. He look stunningly handsome is his new suit, which made me feel even more self-conscious about my frumpy black attire.

"Bella," he said, placing his cold hands on each of my shoulders, "All you have to do is move the mats, give singers their microphones, and stay as far away as possible from the control system. Mike and the other guys have that all under control."

I nodded, breathing in his sweet scent.

"I need to go now, ok?"

I slowly nodded, as if in a trance. He kissed me softly on the forehead.

"You'll be fine," he whispered in his velvety voice. And with him saying the words, I almost believed it. Almost.

And then I was all alone. I could've cried, but Mike came up and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Are you alright, Bella?" he asked. He looked sincere.

"Yeah, Mike, I'm fine," I replied, shaking his hand off my shoulder.

"You look kinda pale," he pointed out. "Wanna come sit for a little. They don't need you until the fourth act."

I _did_ feel a little woozy, so I accepted his invitation to sit next to him and the rest of the guys, right by the light and sound board.

The lights dimmed, and I knew the show was about to begin. Alice was up first. (She had insisted.) The beautiful music filled the auditorium as Alice twirled onto stage. She was even prettier on stage than she was in person with her makeup done perfectly and her spiky hair arranged by Rosalie. The bright lights made her milky white skin sparkle slightly as she moved flawlessly across the stage. All the males in the room (no, make that _everyone_) starred at her with open mouths. I felt sorry for the poor, poor humans who would attempt to perform after her.

When she was finished, everyone was silent. Their mouths hung agape and no one moved. Someone finally broke the silence and began to clap. The rest of the auditorium broke out in applause.

The next acts where boring and mundane compared to Alice's.

"You should probably go join the others backstage," Mike whispered to me after the third act began.

I nodded, and got up to head backstage. But what I didn't take into consideration was the dimmed lighting in the auditorium and my natural clumsiness. I had only taken three steps when I felt my foot catch on a thick cord. I tripped, of course, and fell to the ground with a thud, unplugging the cord in the process. The entire auditorium went pitch black.

I groaned as everyone in the auditorium began to panic. It took fifteen minutes to plug the cord back in and another hour to get everything working and back under control. By that point, it was getting late and we were only three acts into the show.

"I'm sorry," said Mrs. Reese, who was in charge of the entire show. "But because this little 'accident', we're going to have to postpone the rest of the show until tomorrow night. Sorry for the inconvenience." She smiled sweetly as everyone groaned and began to file out of the auditorium.

* * *

"I told you I would ruin the entire show," I told Edward as we drove back home.

He chuckled. "Only you could manage that, Bella. Didn't I tell you stay away from the sound system?"

I could only blush.

"Now tomorrow night, Bella, we're going to find you a nice little seat in the audience and you're going sit and enjoy the show. And you're not going to touch _anything._"

"Sounds pretty safe to me," I smiled.

"Bella, I don't know if you are entirely capable of being safe," Edward told me.

"I could be…if I really tried. Maybe if I wasn't so clumsy. Maybe if…" I stopped because Edward was laughing.

"You wish."


	4. Skiing with the Cullens

A/N: So I actually got this idea back this winter when I went skiing. I thought a ski trip with the Cullens would be very entertaining.

Skiing with the Cullens

I snuggled deeper into my blankets, pulling them tightly around me…so warm…wait, warm? I had grown accustomed to Edward's cold form lying beside me. My eyelids flew open. Dull sunlight streamed through my window and onto my bed. I turned to glance at my alarm clock. 8:00.

"Edward!" I screamed, turning around to see him sitting in the chair across my room. "Why didn't you wake me?! We're going to be late."

I scrambled out of bed and began pulling random articles of clothing out of my dresser drawers. I stopped after a minute and turned to look at Edward. He was laughing.

"And what's so funny?" I snarled through gritted teeth.

"No school today," he informed me.

I cocked my head, a bit confused.

"Snow day," he explained. "Take a look out your window."

I walked over to my foggy window and peered out. My mouth hung open. Everything was covered in a blanket of white. I couldn't even tell where the road was supposed to be. The trees were covered with a layer of snow and icicles hung from their branches. It looked like a winter wonderland.

I fell back against my bed, recovering from my momentary shock. Edward came to join me. He scooped me up in his arms. I rested my cheek on his shoulder. He picked up my wrist and brought to his lips. My heart rate accelerated.

"Relax, Bella." He placed me on my back and lied down next to me. He brought his face close to mine and breathed deeply. My heart rate sped up at first, but as I took deeper breaths, it began to slow.

I locked my eyes with his topaz ones. Edward began to stroke my cheek. He brought his face even closer to mine. I knew what was coming. I knew I had to be good. I tried to stay as calm as I could as his lips softly brushed mine. I cautiously wrapped my arms around his neck. He scooped me up, crushing me against his body, deepening the kiss. Just as my lips began to part, he abruptly pulled away.

"Edwa—" He had disappeared. I looked around in confusion as my door swung open. Charlie. Oh.

"You're up already," Charlie pointed out the obvious. "There's a snow day, if you haven't already noticed."

I tried to catch my breath and regain my focus. It was hard to concentrate on Charlie's words.

"I'm gonna have to leave as soon as the roads clear up a bit," he told me. "Do you know what you're gonna do today?"

"Umm…" I thought for a moment. "I don't know yet. I was planning on calling Edward."

"Good luck actually getting anywhere. I made some eggs and toast. Wanna come down and eat?" asked Charlie.

It touched me that Charlie had taken the time to cook breakfast, but then again, Charlie in the kitchen could be dangerous.

"I'll be down in a minute, Dad," I told him. He left, smiling. Sometimes I was glad he was so oblivious.

Edward appeared by my side a moment later.

"That was close," I said.

"Too close," Edward murmured. "So since you told Charlie you'd be spending the day with me, would you like to know what's on the agenda?"

"You actually have plans?"

"Well, considering Alice can see into the future, we made some probable plans," he said.

"And?" I prodded.

"Have you ever skied before?" he smiled.

"Edward Cullen! You didn't!" I shrieked. "I can't even walk straight! Can you imagine me on skis?!"

Edward chuckled. "So I take it you've never skied. We'll, there's a first time for everything."

"I think I'll stay home," I told him.

"All day?"

I nodded.

"Alone?"

I continued to nod.

"Without me?"

I stopped mid nod.

"Oh fine! You win!" I huffed. "But I'd better not die."

"Bella, seriously," Edward reason with me. "Do you think I would let that happen?"

"Not willingly," I replied. "But you know, I am a danger magnet."

"And that's exactly why you're going with a group of indestructible vampires. Now go get dressed and eat that _lovely _breakfast Charlie prepared for you."

* * *

A few hours later, I stood facing the biggest mountain I have seen. (Okay. So I was exaggerating a bit. The biggest mountain I had ever seen up close while waiting in line to get on that big scary ski lift that went so high up that I couldn't see the top of it…)

"Bella, are you alright?" Edward asked.

I gulped.

"Oh come on, Bella! Don't be scared! This will be fun!" Alice exclaimed enthusiastically.

We were up next to get to get on the ski lift. As soon as I tried to move forward, I immediately tripped. The operator had to stop the lift as Edward picked me up and placed me on the seat. At least there was a bar, I noticed.

"Oh, Bella, what are we going to do with you?" sighed Edward. "You've already fallen and we not even up the hill."

I didn't answer. I was holding onto the bar for dear life and squeezing my eyes shut as tight as they would go.

Edward had to help me off the ski lift when we got to the top because I refused to open my eyes. Finally, after placing me safely on the ground and pleading endlessly, Edward convinced me to open my eyes.

As soon as I opened them, I wished I hadn't. I was peering down a hill that appeared to slope straight down. I opened my mouth to scream, but nothing came out.

"Bella, calm down," Edward tried to reason with me. "That's the beginner's slope. I promise it will be easy."

_Maybe for you, _I thought.

"Would you like to watch Alice go first?" he asked.

I nodded.

Alice flashed me a dazzling smile before speeding off down the hill at lightning speed. My mouth hung open as I stared.

"Okay," said Edward. "So that wasn't the best demonstration. Esme, would you care to show Bella how to ski just a _bit _slower than Alice."

"I sure can," she said with a smile and started down the hill at a much slower pace than Alice. Esme swerved gracefully down the hill. The way she skied, making large, even turns instead going straight down, made it look ten times easier than Alice had made it look.

Once Esme disappeared out of sight, I turned to Edward. "I think I'm ready."

He smiled. "Do you want me to go first? I'll ski just like Esme did and you can follow my path."

I nodded.

I learned two things from going down that slope. One, that skiing is a lot harder than it looks, especially when it's a _vampire _who's demonstrating for you. Two, always bring you vampire boyfriend on ski trips if you want to avoid hitting tree.

I was utterly exhausted by the time we reached the bottom.

"I think I need to sit down for a minute," I told him.

"I'll sit out with you," Esme offered.

"No, that's really okay, Esme," I said. I wasn't looking for sympathy.

"No really, Bella, its fine," she told me, looking sincere. "I'll buy you a hot chocolate."

"You'll be okay, Bella?" asked Edward, looking hopefully up at the slopes.

"Yeah, you guys go have some fun," I urged.

They were gone in a flash. Esme and I headed into the ski lodge to get some hot chocolate. Esme walked gracefully in her perfectly fitted ski boots, while I clunked noisily along in my rented ones.

It was nice to have hot chocolate with Esme. We talked about little things and she didn't seem to mind at all that she wasn't up there skiing with the rest of the bunch.

Edward and the rest returned about an hour later.

"Want to try again?" asked Edward, looking particularly stunning with his wind blown hair. "We've looked around a bit and found a lift that leads to smaller slops," he added hopefully.

"Oh fine. I guess I try again," I caved.

I didn't have as much trouble boarding this ski lift as I had the last one (The operator only had to slow the lift this time for me to get on)

But as soon as we were on, I noticed one major difference. This lift had no bar. I yelped and clung to Edward's arm.

"It's fine, Bella," he promised, wrapping his arm around me.

About half way up, I realized that my ski was hooked on to Edward's. That was going to make it difficult to get off the lift.

I scooted away from Edward. "Let me just try to—" I gave my ski a good hard yank. Our skis immediately came unhooked, but unfortunately I slipped from the seat in the process.

It all happened at an unbearably slow speed. As I fell to my doom, I realized that when I did hit the ground, it was going to be particularly painful. I would probably break nearly every bone in my body. That was the lucky outcome. I knew that if I landed on just the right place on neck, the fall would probably kill me. Surprisingly, I was not panicking.

A moment later, I hit something very hard and cold. It was not nearly as painful as I had imagined it to be. In fact, the impact had been a lot less intense than I had thought it would be. The only pain I felt was a dull aching in my left arm, which smashed under my body.

I open my eyes. I saw Edward's angelic face staring down at mine. Maybe I _had_ died and Edward was part of my heaven.

"Bella? Are you okay?" Edward asked, a note of panic in his voice.

We stopped moving. Wait. Since when had we been moving? The sudden stop made me feel woozy. I groaned.

"What hurts?" Edward took no care to hide his panic. "Bella? Can you hear me?"

I opened my mouth to speak. At first no words came out, and when I was able to speak, my voice was very faint.

"Only my arm, I think."

I felt Edward pry my arm out from under my side. It hurt a considerable amount more when he moved it.

"Dammit," he muttered.

"What?" I asked.

"It think its broken. Carlisle can fix it easily. Can you move it?"

As soon I tried, a burst of pain shot up my arm. I whimpered in agony.

As Edward went to gather the others (Never letting me out of his arms) I found it particularly hard to keep my eyes open.

Edward's voice seemed miles away as he explained what had happened to Carlisle.

And then I passed out.

* * *

When I awoke, I was curled up on Edward's couch. The pain in my arm was dulled. It was then that I realized that I was wearing a bright pink cast.

Edward chuckled, registering my expression. "Alice's pick. Since you weren't conscience for the decision, we decided to let her choose."

"So what's the story? We aren't going to tell everyone I fell off a ski lift and you jumped off to catch me and the only injury resulting from any of this is my broken arm, are we?" I asked.

Edward smiled. "So you remember all that? That's a good sign. Carlisle wasn't sure if you had a concussion or not. Basically, you went skiing and fell on one of slopes, resulting in a broken arm. Nothing more complicated than that."

We were both silent for a moment as I thought that over.

"Edward," I said.

"Yes, darling."

"I told you I should've stayed home. I really almost did die."

Edward shuttered at that remark. "But you didn't. But I do have to say, you are pushing you luck. I might have to stay even closer to you than before."

He joined me on the couch and scooped me into his arms. I snuggled deeper into his arms. "Now that's something I think I can live with."

* * *

A/N: So I'm running out of ideas. Any suggestions for later chapters?


	5. Christmas with the Cullens

A/N: I meant to make these all before Bella is a vampire stories...but that demon vamp child took over my mind and made me write this. I take no resposibility.

Christmas with the Cullens

"Esme, _seven _turkeys? Don't you think that might be a bit too much?" I asked I stared at the seven massive birds that lined the counter top.

"Well, I wasn't sure. With sixteen werewolves, plus their imprints, then Billy, Sue, and Charlie, I wanted to be safe. We can always send them home with the leftovers if we need to. Oh! My stuffing!" Esme hurried off to the stovetop to make sure her stuffing was not burning.

A moment later, Nessie entered the kitchen, twirling around in a sparkly red dress.

"Do you like it, Momma?" she asked, spinning around so I could see.

Nessie was now over a year old, but she appeared to be around seven. Her bronze ringlets rested just below her shoulders (We had finally decided to cut it after it reached her knees, despite Alice's protests.) The dress she wore was made out of red satin, and it had a thin layer of glitter that made her shimmer every time she moved. Her cheeks were flushed from excitement. The blush looked startling against her porcelain skin. As she danced around the kitchen, she looked like a living china doll.

"I think its lovely, darling," I told her.

Nessie beamed. "Rosie chose it for me. And look what Alice gave to me!"

She thrust her wrist toward me, showing me a delicate gold bracelet embedded with tiny diamonds. I rolled my eyes.

"You be careful with that, sweetie. You wouldn't want to lose it," I said. Not that it really mattered. It Nessie misplaced it, Alice would go out and buy her another one before anyone had a chance to look for it.

"I will, Momma," she promised, fingering the tiny diamonds.

"Oh, darn it," Esme's voice came from the other side of the kitchen. "I think I overcooked the stuffing. Nessie, dear, would you come taste it for me?"

Nessie turned to me, a pleading look in her eyes. She hated human food and only ate it when absolutely necessary. She grabbed my hand and showed me just how much she _didn't _want to eat grandma's stuffing.

"Now Nessie," I whispered, though I was sure Esme would still be able to hear me. "You know you're the only one who can taste human food. Can you please do it for Esme?"

She made a face, but proceeded to dance across the kitchen anyway. Just as she was about to taste the stuffing, Jacob bounded into the kitchen.

"Man, everything smells great!" he exclaimed, deeply inhaling the steamy air.

"Jakey!" Nessie shrieked, dashing across the kitchen and attaching herself to one of Jacob's legs.

He promptly scooped her up in his arms. "How's my Ness?"

She giggled. Despite her young age, she was completely enamored 'uncle' Jake. It all made me want to snatch Nessie out of Jacob's arms and banish them both to different sides of the universe. But I supposed there was nothing I could do to stop the inevitable.

Nessie leaned over and whispered something in Jacob's ear. Though she was trying to be quiet about it, Esme and I could clearly hear. "Jake, will you taste that dreadful stuffing for me? Esme wants to know if its burnt…"

Jacob grinned wolfishly. He scooped up a large spoonful of stuffing and shoved it into his mouth. Nessie made a face.

"Mmmm that's good!" Jacob exclaimed, taking another bite.

"Not too burnt?" Esme asked.

"Not that I can tell. And Esme, don't worry. Us wolves will eat just about anything."

Suddenly, the doorbell rang.

"They're here!" Nessie exclaimed, jumping down from Jacob's arms and running to the front door. Jacob immediately followed.

"Its so nice to have a child in the house," Esme mumbled, more to herself than to me.

A moment later, Emmett entered the kitchen, clad in a red Santa suit that was stuffed with pillows around his middle.

I stifled a laugh, but couldn't hold it in. "Emmett! What in the world do you think you're doing?"

Emmett smiled. "Well last Christmas was sort of a waste, considering the Volturi crashed it. I thought I could liven up the party, especially for Nessie."

"You know Emmett, Nessie doesn't believe in Santa…" I trailed off, straightening his beard.

"Scandalous," Emmett pretended to be shocked. "Edward's doings, no doubt?"

"Emmett, Nessie was reading Shakespeare and Dickens by the time she was a few months old. She's a very intelligent child. I think she would've figured it out on her own."

"So you're saying there's a chance she might believe in Santa?"

I only rolled my eyes.

Emmett and I hurried into the family room to join everyone else, leaving Esme to further perfect her cooking.

"Ho! Ho! Ho!" Emmett boomed as he entered the room. He stopped right in front of Nessie. "Would you like to tell Santa what you want for Christmas?"

Nessie dramatically rolled her eyes, and said quite matter-of-factly, "Santa isn't real."

Emmett gasped, and the entire room fell silent, as if their favorite television program had just come on.

"Children who don't believe in Santa don't get presents," stated Emmett.

Nessie faltered, looking at me for guidance (which I could give none of) and then sat down on Emmett's lap. He helped her up, and she abruptly gasped as she felt his cold skin.

"You're not Santa! You're a vampire!"

"Nessie, dear, didn't you know? Santa is a vampire. How else do you think I live for so long?" Emmett stated, and I had to admit it was quite a logical answer.

Nessie was still a bit hesitant, but I could slowly see her starting to believe him. "I suppose…"

Emmett's eyes twinkled. "Now, my dear child, what would you like for Christmas?"

"Well…" said Nessie thoughtfully. "I want the box set of all of Shakespeare's plays, Wuthering Heights (momma says that's quite a good book.)…" she trailed off, still thinking.

"Anything else?" prodded Emmett.

"Oh yes…a Barbie doll."

What a strange child I had.

"Well, I must be going now. I have quite a lot of packages to deliver tonight. I'll be back at your house later," he promised Nessie.

Emmett headed for the front door, "ho, ho, ho-ing" the whole way there.

"Aren't you going to go up the chimney?" asked Nessie.

Emmett laughed nervously. "Umm..well…the front door is easier?"

Nessie wasn't convinced.

Grumbling quietly to himself, Emmett crossed the family room to the massive fireplace, and without another word, he disappeared through the opening.

"Edward," I hissed, motioning to my husband. "How's he doing it?"

"He's climbing up the bricks," Edward marveled.

Wow.

"He really _is _Santa!" exclaimed Nessie.

A few minutes later, Emmett "joined" us.

"Emmett! Emmett!" Nessie shrieked. "You missed Santa! The for real Santa was here and guess what? He's really a vampire and he went right up the chimney!" Nessie paused to catch her breath.

"Darn! I missed Santa?" Emmett pretended to look dejected.

Nessie patted him reassuringly on the back. "Don't worry. He'll be back later."

* * *

The party ended hours later (with only minimal leftovers to be sent home with the werewolves).

"I supposed we should be getting Nessie up to bed now?" said Edward once everyone had left the house.

"Sounds like plan…wait. Where _is _Nessie?" I realized that I had lost track of her in the mayhem of goodbyes.

"Nessie!" I called into the emptiness of the house. "Nessie, love, where are you?"

Edward and I began to search the house, the living room, family room, kitchen, upstairs bedrooms…but she was nowhere to be found. After ten minutes, I was beginning to get a bit concerned.

"Now calm down Bella," Edward tried to soothe me. "She couldn't have gone far…"

Just then, we heard footsteps coming up from the basement. Sure enough, a moment later, Nessie appeared, holding a clear glass in her hand filled with…blood.

"Nessie!" I exclaimed. "What on earth do you think you're doing!? Where did you get that?!"

"Momma, calm down. I got it from Carlisle O- stash (a/n: because we all know he has one now ;D) It's for Santa." Nessie stated.

"But why—" the scent of the blood discontinued my thoughts. I concentrated on not breathing.

"Momma, Santa's a vampire! Why would he want a dreadful cup of milk when he can have this?" Nessie exasperated.

I was going to kill Emmett.

Nessie walked over to the fireplace slowly, trying not to spill the almost full glass. She placed it gently beside a tray off cookies. "Not that he'll want to eat them," explained Nessie. I just thought a glass of blood would look lonely. I explained it all in a note."

"Very thoughtful of you," I mumbled. "Now I think its about time you went up to bed."

"But I want to see Santa again!" whined Nessie.

"But Santa won't come unless you're in bed," I told her.

Nessie nodded, yawning. "I hope he likes O-"

"I'm sure he does…" I trailed off, scooping Nessie up in my arms.

"Merry Christmas, Momma…" whispered Nessie. "Oh, wait...is the Easter Bunny a vampire too?"


End file.
